English made simple

Okay folks, it's a stereotype, but it's amazingly close to reality. As an older student at The U of I, I am forced to look hard for connections to people who I can associate with. The younger crowd is great entertainment, but not often good for serious debate. That is not the stereotype by the way. The stereotype came into play during a discussion with one of the few other older (sort of) students I have in a class. She's going for her Master's in Education, poor thing. Any way, she said that her and another student were discussing the English majors. Knowing that I am such, she apologized ahead of time and told me that she hates the English majors: 'they all smoke...and they wear black all the time. They also seem to think that they are the only authority on literature'. She's right. The majority of the English majors I have seen (and that's a plethora), smoke. We wear black almost like a uniform. I don't consider myself an authority on literature, but I know plenty that do.

Do we do it to be able to identify our own kind? Is it just the personality of the English major? Is it a coinkydink? No idea. Nope. I'm sure that somewhere out there, maybe even at my own college, some group is reaping beacoup bucks to study just such a phenomenon. And if they aren't yet, it will be sponsored by our government soon. Either way, the stereotype seems to represent a reality. Whatever. I could give a fuck. The woman who told me this gave me something to ponder for awhile that wasn't some weird interpretation I'm supposed to be able to make of some archaic scribblings by some long-dead author. I'm happy.

So there it is. English made simple. If you smoke, wear black all the time, and profess to an abundance of literature-related trivia, you must be an English major. Funny, I have more recall on movie lines and fights I had with my recycled husband ten years ago than I have for most books I've read. Maybe I'm in the wrong line of study.